When it comes to food, body image, and weight loss, many women unknowingly make things harder by turning every setback into a reason to attack ourselves. A stressful day becomes proof we're failing. An overeating episode becomes evidence we can't be trusted. Instead of offering ourselves understanding, we pile on more pressure, more criticism, and more disappointment. The problem is that self-criticism rarely creates lasting change. In fact, it often creates more stress, more overwhelm, and more of the very behaviours we’re trying to escape. When life feels hard, the last thing we need is to become another source of pressure for ourselves.

One of the questions I find myself coming back to again and again is this: if your best friend was going through what you're going through right now, how would you respond to her? Would you criticise her for struggling? Would you tell her she's failed because she had a difficult day? Would you remind her of every mistake she's ever made and use it as evidence that she'll never change? Of course not. You'd listen and reassure her, remind her that a few difficult moments don't define her. You would be there for her.

The truth is, you are going to spend your entire life with yourself. Through every challenge, every success, every mistake, and every triumph. Learning how to be there for yourself and be on your own side may be one of the most important skills you'll ever develop. It means responding to yourself with the same steadiness, honesty, and compassion you would offer someone you care about. Asking "What do I need right now?" instead of "What's wrong with me?" It means recognising that difficult moments are part of being human and not proof that you're broken.

Of course it’s so easy to read this and think ‘Yes, that’s so true, it all makes sense’ but not really changing. But what would the world look like if we all backed ourselves? If we all became our own source of validation and reassurance, instead of abandoning ourselves? If we could all cut ourselves some slack and took the stance that modern life can be overwhelming and hard? We can be so forgiving and graceful with everyone else, yet so tough and harsh on ourselves. Perhaps it’s time to forgive ourselves of our own humanness, move on from expecting perfection and learn how to support ourselves in a deeper way. We are all worth it 💖