In my honest opinion too many women are waiting for life to begin once they've lost the weight, stopped overeating, or finally feel confident in their bodies. They put off wearing the clothes they love, taking photos with them in it, going to the beach, saying yes to certain plans, until they’ve lost the weight. They put off allowing themselves to fully show up in their own lives and really, why? Shame has a way of quietly stealing years from us, it convinces us that our lives should be put on hold until we're different somehow. And before we know it, we've spent far too much time hiding, waiting, and missing moments we can never get back.

The truth is, shame is not a particularly effective motivator for lasting change. I remember when I was 19 writing myself a letter to read every time I had a craving, chastising myself out of eating the food. Looking back, it was an absolutely horrible letter and it 150% did not work. If anything, it made me feel worse about myself which, of course, only saw me turn to food all the more. Shame might create a burst of determination for a few days, but underneath it sits a painful belief that something is wrong with you. And when you believe you're the problem, every setback feels like proof. The women I work with aren't struggling because they're lazy, weak, or lacking discipline. They're struggling because they've been carrying emotional pressure, subconscious patterns, and internal battles all of which no amount of self-criticism can solve. The answer isn't more shame, it's understanding.

Because life is happening now. Not ten, twenty, thirty kilos from now. Not after you've had the "perfect" week of eating. Not once you've finally learned how to control every craving. Right now. Your laughter, your relationships, your memories, your joy are all so much more important than spending your life feeling ashamed. The goal isn't to earn your way into living fully, it's to stop believing you have to. The moment you start releasing shame, you create space for far more powerful things. Compassion, freedom, and the possibility of real change. And that is a much better way to spend the life you've been given. So why wait?